• Just got back from taking LD out on a VERY TIGHT trail. OMG!!!! He was such a good boy. I can't believe it. No wrecks, no freaking out!! #

The days are getting easier every day. I can now tell people that he is gone without crying or choking. I can look at his pictures with crying.

The first day was the hardest. We had to move Little Dude into Lookie’s stall the day we put Lookie down. That was hard for me to do, but I had to. The horse next to him needs a companion at night.

The Friday after, the farrier came out for LD & realized that there was no more Lookie to have done. No more seeing the farrier every 3-4 weeks. No more frantic phone calls and texts telling dennis that lookie had lost his packing &/or shoes. I get to see the farrier in a more normal time frame now.

I miss Lookie & his antics. There is no more dancing horse asking for treats next to the fence. The gates are safe for the moment, as niether LD or Deseo are as smart as Lookie. Don’t get me wrong, LD is a character, just a different type of character. He dives fences. He plays with me in the pasture. He give hugs and kisses (as long as you get down on his level).  It is going to take me some time to adjust to this new life.

As far as a new horse, We am looking for one, but it is going to take time. We won’t just settle for just anyone.  It is got to be a lot like Lookie. We will know the horse when we meet him. I don’t think that we are going to seriously look until after the winter season is done. The show season is really busy for Paul & I, but you never know.

LD will be showing this season with me as his driver (I hope). Wish us Luck. If everything goes as planned, our first public outing will be September 18th, 2010 in Wellington, FL.

• Spent time w/ Little Dude yesterday, just hanging out, No work. I would have like 2 spend more time w/ Lookie like that before he passed. #
• @SolitaireMare My Prayers are with you. I know how you feel. #
• little dude literally worked out of his shoes today! Farrier is coming fri. He could have cared less! He didn't tell me he was missing it! #
• today the farrier was out 4 LD & it hit me hard that there was no Lookie to have done. Dennis is 1 of the reasons that Lookie made 3 yrs. #
• @SolitaireMare I understand. No words are of comfort right now. My heart aches with the pain of your loss too. in reply to SolitaireMare #
• @SolitaireMare may you find the peace you need right now. in reply to SolitaireMare #

I am sorry for the timing of this post,
but I just didn’t know where to start. I had to do some griefing & some rethinking about things.

So, let me begin. Lookie was put down on July 5th, 2010, after an almost 3 year fight with laminitis. I did what was best for him, not what was easiest for me. I loved him so much, it hurts. We had plans for the winter show season, but they were not meant to be.

We always dreaded the summer. Lookie’s feet were always at thier worst during this time of year. This year was no different. What began like an abcsess or an injury in his rear left leg, became the catalyst for that foot & his front feet. They just couldn’t hold together long enough. 

We will carry on. Little dude will have To learn to show without his big brother & Port Mayaka will be emotional for me. I think about him everytime I’m around the barn.

Lookie is with us in spirit & I will never forget him. There will be other horses in our lives, but lookie will always be special in my eyes. I just hope we can live up to the expectations that lookie had for us, now that he is gone.